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Site online since
10-18-1999

Site last updated
06-29-2021



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        VERY IMPORTANT!!! Some of these links are still broken, as my entire web server system went to pot before I was able to salvage everything!



Quickie? Pulse 6 Electric Wheelchair
The Sh!t List (1 page)
(Also known as, "The Poopie List" -- a list of sh!ts that was posted to dial-up BBSs in the 1980s and 1990s)
(The "S" word is used very frequently)
Last update: 09-10-14

Bad BBS Usernames (1 page)
(A list of BBS usernames that are particularly bad)
(Some BBS usernames have toilet words in them)
Last update: 11-21-12

366 Ways To Kill Barney the Purple Toilet Dinosaur (1 page)
(Fantasy violence against a phoney-bologna purple dinosaur, slightly strong language)
Last update: 07-17-04


366 Ways To Kill Hudson Horstachio (from Viva Piñata) (1 page)
(Fantasy violence against a paper horse, slightly strong language)
Last update: 03-23-12

366 Ways To Kill Squidward Tentacles (from SpongeBob SquarePants) (1 page)
(Fantasy violence against a phoney-bologna sea critter, slightly strong language)
Last update: 03-23-12

A memorial to my dad Norm Johnson (3 pages)
Last update: 01-18-20

A memorial to my best friend Paul Casey (3 pages)
Last update: 01-19-20 (Repaired some "bucking fusted" graphics and resurrected the missing last page)

A memorial to one of my best friends Primo (1 page) (Very minor toilet tongue in one paragraph)
Last update: 03-29-10 (Wrote a memorial computer demo program)

The Poorly-Drawn Toilets Page(1 page)
(User-submitted pictures of poorly-drawn floortoilets and walltoilets) (1 page)
Last update: 02-11-11

The Juneau Receiving Home (1 page)
(Just some memories of having lived in this facility) Last update: 01-15-11

Looking for ***FOUND*** John Robbins (1 page)
(Self-explanatory - I'm looking for this man)
Last update: 12-17-10


Insulators: The Hidden Obsession (23 pages)
(Yes, I collect those things too. Lots of info, fotos, & links.) (23 pages)
Last update: 07-27-06

Hell on Wheels (4 pages)
(Adding lights to an electric wheelchair)
Last update: 01-04-12 (Moved the website to another new server)


HAPPY DRONERDAZE
Website established 05-12-19; all of my drone-related material is in one place now.


The "Wheezer" Diary (1 page)
A way to track inhaler use.
Last update: 03-12-16


The Ganja Diary (1 page)
A way to track maryjane use.
Last update: 06-22-16


The Computer Diary (1 page)
A way to keep track of computer time (my stepmother is limiting my computer time to just 90 minutes a day -- I live in her house so I have to play by her rules).
Last update 03-12-16


Dream Diary (79 pages)
(If I remember the dream, so do you.)
(Dialogue)
Last update: 12-28-14


One Shelton WA. Citizen's UFO Sightings (1 page)
(Dialogue)
Last update: 02-08-10


Five Furry Fuzzbombs (16 pages)
(Lots of information about pet rats. Includes my own pets.)
Last update: 02-18-11 (Moved the website to another new server)


The Amazing Plastic Toilet Cam (1 page)
Last update: 02-28-05
(Archival only; no longer an active webcam!)


Toilet!!! Toilet!!! (1 page)
Last update: 02-20-06
(Silly and wasteful page with a photograph of a sh!tbowl on it.)


The Fud Diary 2015
The Fud Diary 2016
The Fud Diary 2017
The "Siggeret" Diary (18 pages)
(A way to keep track of tobacco use - seventeen diaries available)
Last update: 09-15-15

The "Koffy" Diary I (1 page)
(A way to keep track of coffee use)
Last update: 06-19-10

The "Koffy" Diary II (1 page)
(A way to keep track of coffee use)
Last update: 06-29-10

The "Koffy" Diary III (1 page)
(A way to keep track of coffee use)
Last update: 02-26-15

Safeco Field: A Photo Tour (43 pages)
(A photo tour of Seattle's Safeco Field (where the Mariners play)
Last update: 02-18-11 (Moved the website to another new server)


Pictures of a "Fagget" (1 page)
(Photographs of a male homo & his "fag flag")
Last update: 10-13-06

The Life & Times of a Commodore 64 Computer (1 page)
(Screen dumps and downloads of some C=64 demos I wrote in the early-1990s)
(One of the demo titles is a toilet word)
Last update: 03-11-10 (added a second video)

Fictional Band Names (1 page)
(A list of at least 6,296 phoney band names)
(Some band names have toilet words in them)
Last update: 08-04-09

Changed Lyrics for Two TV Theme Songs (1 page)
(Self-explanatory - altered lyrics for two TV program theme songs)
(Some fairly extensive toilet language is present)
Last update: 02-20-10

Made-Up Words (1 page)
(Self-explanatory - phoney-bologna, made-up words)
Last update: 07-29-09

Lyrics to Songs I Frequently Listen To (2 pages)
(Self-explanatory - lyrics to songs that are high on my listening list)
(some lyrics have toilet words in them)
Last update: 09-07-09

7 Uses for a Dead Barney the Purple Toilet Dinosaur (1 page)
(Fantasy violence against a fake dinosaur, slightly strong language)
Last update: 11-18-06


82 Ways to Break Light Bulbs (1 page)
(Self-explanatory, don't you think?)
(Dialogue)
Last update: 01-10-11


The Infomercial Toilet (7 pages)
(Funny "reviews" of late-night TV infomercials.)
(Moderate Language, Fantasy Violence, Bunghole-Emptying Laughter)
Last update: 02-13-10 (Moved the website to a new server)


When Good Toilets...Go BAD!!! (When toilets and their owners don't get along)
(5 pages)
(Slightly Strong Language, Fantasy Violence Against Toilets)
Last update: 02-13-10 (Moved the website to a new server)


The Original Jammin' Johns (1 page)
(Toilets dancing to the song "Funkytown")
Last update: 01-17-11 (Republished it)


When TV Commercials ATTACK! (1 page)
(About the asininity of regular TV comercials)
(Extremely Strong Language)
Last update: 02-13-10 (Moved the website to a new server)


The Deliberate Destruction of a Toy R2-D2 Robot (1 page)
(Fantasy violence against a toy robot, slightly strong language)
Last update: 01-19-20 (Repaired all of the "bucking fusted" videos)


Children's Book Titles that should Never Be (1 page)
(Very slightly strong language)
Last update: 04-20-10


Cumpenys Hoo Kant Spel (1 page)
Last update: 05-17-10


I, Faggot: The Page Only 10% Of You Should Have Clicked On (1 page)
(Dialogue)
Last update: 06-29-10


The Ultimate Anti-Hero (17 pages)
(Battles staged between TV commercial characters)
(Fantasy violence, considerable toilet tongue)
Last update: 09-14-13 (added a battle between that gosh darn-diddly-arn queer Hamburger Helper Hand and that asinine Quaker Oats prick)


Hate That Bee! (1 page)
(Commercial mascots we all hate and would like to see destroyed)
TV-PG (Fantasy violence; some toilet language)
Last update: 01-23-11


Home is Where the Bulb Is (4 pages)
(A look in & outside my former home in Seattle)
Last update: 01-23-11


What the #@&%$ was That? (1 page)
(What the 2001 Nisqually earthquake did to my home)
(Very slight toilet tongue)
Last update: 01-23-11


BACHELOR'S CLEANING TIPS:

How to F**king Vacuum (7 pages)
(How to Vacuum and disembowelling the vacume cleaner when it pisses you off)
(Extremely Strong Language)
Last update: 02-13-10 (Moved the website to a new server)

How to Clean a F**king Toilet (2 pages)
(How to clean a f**king sh!tbowl)
(Very strong language)
Last update: 06-27-06

Pictures of Broken Things (1 page)
(Self-explanatory)
(Fantasy violence)
Last update: 02-04-20

The Deliberate Torture of a Vacuum Cleaner (4 pages)
(Beating the Devil out of a Euro-Pro #EP601 Bagless Stick Shark Vacuum Cleaner)
(Fantasy Violence Against a Vaccume Cleaner)
Last update: 01-22-20 (Added a link about the now-defunct website Babelfish)





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Copyright © 1989-2021

Craig S. Johnson

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I have invested over 45,056 hours of my own time into developing & maintaining this website, so please don't plagiarize it.